Hommage to my aunt Jozica
My aunt passed away recently.
Today is her funeral. ( I can't and am not allowed to be there, also due to covid restrictions)
It was not covid.
Her heart just have up.
She suffered too much, mostly in silence.
She was a shining light for the children she took care as a teacher in kindergarten.
She was deeply religious person and admitted often that faith saved her life.
On a daily basis.
In the hundreds of deaths from covid, which are actually a result of mismanagement and failure of the people in charge ( but that is another matter alltogether) one death means nothing.
And it is sometimes a blessing,
Had she not passed away, she would continue, to be locked up in the old people's home (which we strove so hard to get her in, once it became impossible and dangerous to live alone even with help) with almost no visits, alone and lonely.
Now she is free.
I am not here for attention or sympathy.
Though I do admit I in grief, added to all the other grief that is in the air and most of my compatriots are steeped in,
I am here to honour her memory and state how important it is ,for us to learn to express, deal with, feel, manage and release our emotions.
Realising that almost a decade of hard inner work I still fall short at dealing with emotions.
(Especially with people I love the most.)
Makes me think.
I guess I have moved mountains in the last decade.
I am not plagued by endless depressions. My stomach is not falling to pieces.
My body is rather fit, (thanx to my sensei Matej). My outbursts of rage are short lived.
I create, I live I care, I can sometime support others going through similar processes.
Still, I can't stress enough how important it is for us to deal with emotions.
I pray that this teaching comes to us Slovenians, starting with me by the intercession of my aunt Jozica and her Late husband Janko.
Both amazing, great souls that are surely bathing in the light of God as I write these words.
Bless her and bless him and may they enjoy their companionship by the throne off the Almighty.
In the name of Master Jesus and all the saints of our lineage,
Bless you aunt Jozica
and thank you for all the honey.
Rest in peace and glory of God.