Me and Zen
I was clumsy, and I bowed awkwardly and I had no idea what I was doing there.
My mind was doing antics all the time and I was like a berserker maniac Viking who stumbled into the temple by mistake and stayed for he fun of it.
But I had respect for the Teacher and the Teaching, and everyone around me.
To the best of my ability.
And I stayed, because I though, maybe If I sit long enough, my life might be less chaotic and I might somehow find balance.
And I did, sometimes, more by mistake, when I was not trying.,
And it helped, a lot, looking back at it.
But only after I stopped chasing for enlightenment or this or that deep wisdom, and realised the simplicity of it all
Until I forgot again and went back to my old manic self.
Ground yourself in enlightenment, said my friend and sort of a teacher.
I still think he was being to kind,
I know nothing of enlightenment and it is more of a torture to sit still.
Unless I sit with my people.
Of any path and any conviction.
I am held be the Light of so many bodhisattvas, that I barely knew.
That must count for something
And I think it is worth being
Grateful for.
I give my homage to the dharma, the Buddha and my Sangha
And I bless them and hope they are doing well
Till I stumble upon them
Again.